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Institute Category

Modern Life & Routines

Monday victimhood, Sunday spirals, alarm negotiation, weather moods.

TERMINAL (13)

Terminal 'I'll Remember, Don't Worry' Breach Patient has, on 144 documented occasions, refused to write it down. Patient has, on 143 of those occasions, fo
Terminal 'Let Them' Theory Patient has applied 'let them' to rent, taxes, a restraining order, and a leaking dishwasher. Has not taken an
Terminal 3 AM Ceiling Review Patient lies awake at 3:14 AM reviewing, in chronological order, every socially awkward moment of their life f
Terminal Chairdrobe Accumulation Patient has one (1) designated chair in the bedroom, and that chair has not been sat on in approximately four
Terminal Fruit-Sticker Ingestion Patient has just bitten into an apple. Halfway through, they feel an unfamiliar texture on their tongue. It is
Terminal Green-Bubble Shaming Reflex Patient receives a message that appears, in the group chat, as a green bubble. Without conscious thought, pati
Terminal Mental-Browser Overflow Patient cannot stop thinking. About anything. Currently replaying a conversation from 2013 and simultaneously
Terminal Norwegian-Cabin Fantasy Disorder Patient has, in theory, a full to-do list. In practice, patient is in bed at 2:47 PM wearing yesterday's T-shi
Terminal One-Trip Grocery Carry Patient has returned from the grocery store and will, under no circumstances, make a second trip from car to k
Terminal Post-Credits-Scene Completionism Patient sits through every second of every credit sequence on the possibility of a post-credits scene. Has don
Terminal Pumpkin-Patch Mandate Patient has, every October, required a pumpkin-patch excursion. There must be three outfits, two lattes, and a
Terminal Screen-Required Mealtime Patient cannot begin a meal without a video playing. A show they are watching, a show they have already watche
Terminal Sunglasses-On-Head Amnesia Patient placed their sunglasses on top of their head 20 minutes ago and has spent the last 18 of those minutes

PATHOLOGICAL (10)

SEVERE (20)

CHRONIC (19)

ADVANCED (6)

ACUTE (13)

COMPULSIVE (1)

Compulsive Alarm-Snooze Addiction Patient negotiates with their alarm in 9-minute increments for a total of 84 minutes daily. Has been late to e

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