UNTREATABLE.COM
| Dosage | Zero (0) Steam purchases during the next three consecutive seasonal sales |
| Frequency | Three sales; approximately nine months of restraint |
| Duration | Permanent reset |
| Refills | Unlimited — the cemetery will, apparently, still be there |
The Institute dispenses Ludorum Congelatio for:
Ludorum Congelatio is part of the Institute Pharmacy's formulary of satirical prescriptions. Everything on this slip is fictional except the behavior it addresses. A real pharmacist, handed this slip, would decline to fill it. Patients are invited to fill it themselves.
Patients know it in practice as Steam-Cart Freeze, one sale — the Latin is ceremonial; the English form is what they actually execute.
Need a prescription of your own? Describe your complaint to the Institute Pharmacy. Or browse the full formulary.