UNTREATABLE.COM
| Dosage | One (1) conversation with the partner about the dog's sleeping arrangement, held before the dog enters the room |
| Frequency | Once; repeat if deferred |
| Duration | Permanent resolution |
| Refills | 0 — the 18 inches are not, apparently, structural; they are negotiable |
The Institute dispenses Lectus Restitutus for:
Lectus Restitutus is a formal prescription dispensed by the Institute Pharmacy for the behavioral complaint described above. It is not a real medication, will not be found in any pharmacopoeia, and cannot be filled at a real pharmacy. It can, however, be filled by the patient, for the patient, at home.
In the Institute Pharmacy's ledger, this prescription is entered under the English reading Bed Reclaimed, jointly — a description patients tend to find more useful than the Latin.
Need a prescription of your own? Describe your complaint to the Institute Pharmacy. Or browse the full formulary.