UNTREATABLE.COM
The dog sleeps in the middle of the bed. Patient and partner sleep on either side. The dog has priority. When the partner attempted, in March, to reclaim the center of the bed, patient gently said 'he was there first.' The partner has, since, slept with 18 inches less mattress. The dog is a rescue. The dog is also the reason a specific conversation has been deferred four separate times.
Chronic. The dog's territorial claim has outlasted two of the partner's attempts to raise it.
None. The partner's 18 inches have become, apparently, structural.
Patients with Terminal Pet-First Marriage Displacement typically present with some or all of the following:
Terminal Pet-First Marriage Displacement was added to the Institute catalog in response to a pattern our clinicians kept seeing. The pattern did not have a real name. This is the real name now. Everything about this entry is made up, except the behavior.
The Institute has assigned this condition the Latin binomial Canis prae coniuge in thalamo — fictional nomenclature for a non-fictional pattern.
Think you have it? Find out what else you might be suffering from at the diagnosis generator. Or browse the full index of afflictions.