Formulary Entry

Commentarium Abstinentia

UNTREATABLE.COM

Institute Pharmacy · Dispensary No. 1

℞

Rx #89,896 Online Life & Social Media

Prescribed

Commentarium Abstinentia

(Comment-Section Abstinence, complete)

Dosage	Zero (0) engagement with comment-section debates for 30 consecutive days, including reading the comments
Frequency	Continuous
Duration	30 days minimum
Refills	Unlimited — the comment section will, apparently, remain full of wrong people without patient's corrections

Side effects May include the specific restlessness of a thread left unread, the phantom urge to 'just see what they're saying,' and — by week three — the observation that the 94 hours logged in comment-section debates this year had produced, apparently, zero changed minds and one elevated blood pressure reading.

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Prescribed for

The Institute dispenses Commentarium Abstinentia for:

Severe comment-section combat disorder
The keyboard-warrior engagement pattern
The specific 40-minute 280-character rebuttal cycle deployed against strangers in time zones patient is not in

What is this?

Prescription Commentarium Abstinentia belongs to the Institute Pharmacy's catalog of non-pharmacological interventions. The dosage is fictional. The intervention it describes is not. Patients who follow it tend to observe the predicted side effects.

The pharmacy's plain-language rendering is Comment-Section Abstinence, complete. The Latin is for the slip; the English reading is for filling it at home.

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Prescribed for

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