UNTREATABLE.COM
Patient commented 'INFO' on a guru's Instagram post at 2:14 PM. Within 6 minutes, a stranger in patient's DMs was asking about 'pain points.' Patient answered honestly — hates job, has credit-card debt. The stranger, who is not the guru, booked patient into a Zoom 'Strategy Session.' The session was a 47-minute sales pitch for a $3,400 course. Patient did not buy. Patient did not leave the call either. Has, this week, commented 'INFO' on a different post.
Chronic. The sequence is, apparently, recognizable but not, yet, avoidable.
None. A physician with actual credentials would be more useful than our paperwork.
Patients with Severe Instagram-DM-Setter Engagement typically present with some or all of the following:
This is the Institute's entry for Severe Instagram-DM-Setter Engagement — a severe condition cataloged for archival purposes and shared for patient use. No prescription exists. No intervention has been shown effective. Recognition is the primary benefit of diagnosis.
Formal name: Colloquium digitale venditatorium. Not found in the DSM-5 or ICD-11. Found, routinely, in the patient population.
Think you have it? Find out what else you might be suffering from at the diagnosis generator. Or browse the full index of afflictions.