UNTREATABLE.COM
| Dosage | One (1) pair of non-athletic pants purchased and worn to one non-gym occasion |
| Frequency | Quarterly minimum |
| Duration | Lifelong wardrobe expansion |
| Refills | Unlimited — jeans, apparently, still exist |
The Institute dispenses Vestis Extra-Gymnasii for:
Vestis Extra-Gymnasii is part of the Institute Pharmacy's formulary of satirical prescriptions. Everything on this slip is fictional except the behavior it addresses. A real pharmacist, handed this slip, would decline to fill it. Patients are invited to fill it themselves.
Patients know it in practice as Outside-the-Gym Wardrobe, acquired — the Latin is ceremonial; the English form is what they actually execute.
Need a prescription of your own? Describe your complaint to the Institute Pharmacy. Or browse the full formulary.