UNTREATABLE.COM
| Dosage | Zero (0) full-voiced conversations held with the cat in the presence of guests |
| Frequency | Per guest visit |
| Duration | Permanent practice |
| Refills | Unlimited — the cat will, apparently, receive the full voice when the guests leave |
The Institute dispenses Canis Osculum Abstinentia for:
The Institute issues Canis Osculum Abstinentia for the specific pattern cataloged in the paired condition file. All dispensing information — dosage, frequency, duration, refills — is meant to be read, not filled. The side-effects line, as with every Institute prescription, is where the treatment actually lives.
Translated into plain language, the prescription reads Cat-Conversation Abstinence, in public. The dosage follows from the name.
Need a prescription of your own? Describe your complaint to the Institute Pharmacy. Or browse the full formulary.