UNTREATABLE.COM
Patient, in the passenger seat of their spouse's car, critiques every single driving decision in real time. 'You're in the wrong lane.' 'That light was yellow.' 'Why are you braking?' Has been doing this for nine years. The spouse has a thousand-yard stare. The couple has been to therapy specifically to discuss this and returned to the behavior within 40 miles.
Permanent. Marriage counseling has not adjusted the pattern.
Untreatable. Each critique is, in their view, safety-motivated.
Patients with Terminal Spouse Driving Critique typically present with some or all of the following:
Terminal Spouse Driving Critique belongs to the Institute's growing taxonomy of behaviors that real medicine has declined to name. It exists, roughly, at the intersection of internet culture, interpersonal friction, and whatever is happening in the lives of our patients. It is fictional and it is everywhere.
Under its Latin label Critica coniugis eterna, the condition appears only in the Institute's own catalog. Real clinicians do not recognize the term. They recognize the behavior.
Think you have it? Find out what else you might be suffering from at the diagnosis generator. Or browse the full index of afflictions.