UNTREATABLE.COM
Patient, from the passenger seat, narrates every upcoming turn a quarter mile in advance, including turns Google Maps has not suggested. Says 'you're going to want the left lane' after the driver has already changed lanes. Reads the speedometer out loud when unnecessary. Offers 'I think this is the exit' at the exact moment the exit is passed.
Chronic. Deteriorates in unfamiliar cities.
None. Removal from the passenger seat triggers withdrawal.
Patients with Advanced Backseat Navigation Disorder typically present with some or all of the following:
Patients diagnosed with Advanced Backseat Navigation Disorder present with a cluster of recognizable behaviors we have, on reflection, decided to name. The condition is fictional. The behaviors, unfortunately, are not. Someone in your life is showing at least two of them right now.
The Institute's taxonomic entry lists it as Directio sessione posteriore obligata, a binomial coined in-house and used nowhere in the peer-reviewed literature.
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