UNTREATABLE.COM
Patient spends 14 hours a week on their YouTube channel, podcast, or Etsy shop. The shop has 3 subscribers, 41 downloads, or 2 sales, depending on which night it is being checked. The partner has, since the project launched 22 months ago, spent most evenings next to patient on the couch while patient edits. The edit occupies approximately 90% of patient's attention. The remaining 10%, meanwhile, is on checking the analytics.
Chronic. Each project requires more evenings than the last.
None. The channel, apparently, is going to pop 'any week now.'
Patients with Chronic Side-Project Companion Abandonment typically present with some or all of the following:
Chronic Side-Project Companion Abandonment is a chronic behavioral condition cataloged by the Institute. It is not recognized by the DSM-5, the ICD-11, or any existing diagnostic framework — and will not be, because it is not a real condition. It is, however, observed in the population with alarming frequency.
In the Institute's formal nomenclature, this condition is catalogued under the Latin binomial Opus collaterale prae coniunge — a name not recognized by any medical authority but observed repeatedly in the catalog.
Think you have it? Find out what else you might be suffering from at the diagnosis generator. Or browse the full index of afflictions.