UNTREATABLE.COM
Patient has, in the last 40 minutes, adjudicated: whose turn it was with the red Lego, who started it, whether 'breathing on me' constitutes a legal grievance, and why the 7-year-old is, allegedly, 'always the favorite.' Has ruled on all four. Has made nobody happy. The 7-year-old is, apparently, not the favorite. Patient is now drinking coffee cold.
Chronic. A new case arrives approximately every 22 minutes.
None. 'Work it out yourselves' has not been accepted as precedent.
Patients with Acute Sibling Rivalry Refereeing Fatigue typically present with some or all of the following:
Acute Sibling Rivalry Refereeing Fatigue belongs to the Institute's growing taxonomy of behaviors that real medicine has declined to name. It exists, roughly, at the intersection of internet culture, interpersonal friction, and whatever is happening in the lives of our patients. It is fictional and it is everywhere.
Under its Latin label Arbitratio fraterna exhaustiva, the condition appears only in the Institute's own catalog. Real clinicians do not recognize the term. They recognize the behavior.
Think you have it? Find out what else you might be suffering from at the diagnosis generator. Or browse the full index of afflictions.