UNTREATABLE.COM
Patient cannot engage in any conversation without redirecting it toward the condition of their starter. Often accompanied by unsolicited hydration ratios and photographs of bread.
Untreatable. Symptoms intensify during dinner parties.
Cannot be cured. Partners are advised to leave quietly during the night.
Patients with Terminal Sourdough Discourse typically present with some or all of the following:
Terminal Sourdough Discourse belongs to the Institute's growing taxonomy of behaviors that real medicine has declined to name. It exists, roughly, at the intersection of internet culture, interpersonal friction, and whatever is happening in the lives of our patients. It is fictional and it is everywhere.
Under its Latin label Panis acidus obsessivus, the condition appears only in the Institute's own catalog. Real clinicians do not recognize the term. They recognize the behavior.
Think you have it? Find out what else you might be suffering from at the diagnosis generator. Or browse the full index of afflictions.