UNTREATABLE.COM
Patient has perfect recall of every event, conversation, and minor grievance within their friend group dating back to 2016. Will, at any moment, correct someone else's retelling with 'actually, Jess said that in March 2019 at the bowling place.' Is correct every time. Other friends have stopped arguing. Patient is not smug about it. Patient is simply, at this point, the archive.
Chronic. Each new year adds to the dataset.
None. Patient is the group's unofficial ombudsman.
Patients with Terminal Friend-Group Historian Disorder typically present with some or all of the following:
Terminal Friend-Group Historian Disorder is a terminal behavioral condition cataloged by the Institute. It is not recognized by the DSM-5, the ICD-11, or any existing diagnostic framework — and will not be, because it is not a real condition. It is, however, observed in the population with alarming frequency.
In the Institute's formal nomenclature, this condition is catalogued under the Latin binomial Memoria sociale totalis perpetua — a name not recognized by any medical authority but observed repeatedly in the catalog.
Think you have it? Find out what else you might be suffering from at the diagnosis generator. Or browse the full index of afflictions.