UNTREATABLE.COM
Patient has not completed a workout without a mirror selfie since 2017. Squats are performed primarily for lighting.
Rep count declining. Follower count climbing.
Incurable. The gym is the set.
Patients with Severe Gatsby-Gym-Selfie Disorder typically present with some or all of the following:
Severe Gatsby-Gym-Selfie Disorder is a severe behavioral condition cataloged by the Institute. It is not recognized by the DSM-5, the ICD-11, or any existing diagnostic framework — and will not be, because it is not a real condition. It is, however, observed in the population with alarming frequency.
In the Institute's formal nomenclature, this condition is catalogued under the Latin binomial Mirror-selfie absolutus narcissica — a name not recognized by any medical authority but observed repeatedly in the catalog.
Think you have it? Find out what else you might be suffering from at the diagnosis generator. Or browse the full index of afflictions.