UNTREATABLE.COM
Patient attends every car meet within a 94-mile radius. Posts photos to Instagram at each one. Has used the same three captions since 2023. Takes the same three photos — front three-quarters, engine bay, wheel close-up — at every event regardless of venue. Has accumulated 2,847 photos of cars that are not theirs. Their own car has been modified, documented, and posted more times than their partner's birthday.
Chronic. The content volume outpaces the photography skill.
None. The next meet is, apparently, this Saturday.
Patients with Advanced Car-Meet Instagram Pilgrimage typically present with some or all of the following:
Advanced Car-Meet Instagram Pilgrimage was added to the Institute catalog in response to a pattern our clinicians kept seeing. The pattern did not have a real name. This is the real name now. Everything about this entry is made up, except the behavior.
The Institute has assigned this condition the Latin binomial Congregatio vehicularis documentata — fictional nomenclature for a non-fictional pattern.
Think you have it? Find out what else you might be suffering from at the diagnosis generator. Or browse the full index of afflictions.