Formulary Entry

Participatio Audibilis

UNTREATABLE.COM

Institute Pharmacy · Dispensary No. 1

℞

Rx #93,428 Workplace & Hustle

Prescribed

Participatio Audibilis

(Audible Participation, one message)

Dosage	One (1) Slack message posted per day in a channel patient actually belongs to — not a reaction emoji, an actual message
Frequency	Daily minimum
Duration	Permanent practice
Refills	0 — the lurking is, apparently, being noticed more than patient thinks

Side effects May include the specific exposure of a thought patient would have preferred to hold, the phantom urge to 'just keep reading for now,' and — critically — the observation that the manager has, across the quarterly-review period, noted that patient is 'engaged in threads but not visibly contributing,' which had been, apparently, the lurking pattern becoming visible.

Fill this prescription

📁 Browse full list

Prescribed for

The Institute dispenses Participatio Audibilis for:

Chronic Slack-ghost syndrome
The always-online-never-posting pattern
The specific silent-reader dynamic patient has maintained across six teams over two years of remote work

What is this?

Participatio Audibilis is part of the Institute Pharmacy's formulary of satirical prescriptions. Everything on this slip is fictional except the behavior it addresses. A real pharmacist, handed this slip, would decline to fill it. Patients are invited to fill it themselves.

Patients know it in practice as Audible Participation, one message — the Latin is ceremonial; the English form is what they actually execute.

Need a prescription of your own? Describe your complaint to the Institute Pharmacy. Or browse the full formulary.

Prescribed for

What is this?

Related conditions

Related prescriptions