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Formulary Entry

Colloquium Realistatis

UNTREATABLE.COM
Institute Pharmacy · Dispensary No. 1
Rx #21,540 Self-Image & Ego
Prescribed
Colloquium Realistatis
(Reality Check, with evidence)
DosageOne (1) written audit of what peers are actually doing (not what they are posting), gathered by direct questions to three friends patient trusts
FrequencyQuarterly
DurationPermanent practice
RefillsUnlimited — the curated feed will, apparently, continue to produce the illusion
Side effects May include the specific deflation of discovering the friend patient envies is $47,000 in credit-card debt, the phantom urge to dismiss the new data and return to the original anxiety, and — critically — the observation that the "everyone else has it figured out" feeling had been, apparently, a feeling patient's friends also reported having, about patient.
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Prescribed for

The Institute dispenses Colloquium Realistatis for:

What is this?

Colloquium Realistatis is a formal prescription dispensed by the Institute Pharmacy for the behavioral complaint described above. It is not a real medication, will not be found in any pharmacopoeia, and cannot be filled at a real pharmacy. It can, however, be filled by the patient, for the patient, at home.

In the Institute Pharmacy's ledger, this prescription is entered under the English reading Reality Check, with evidence — a description patients tend to find more useful than the Latin.

Need a prescription of your own? Describe your complaint to the Institute Pharmacy. Or browse the full formulary.