UNTREATABLE.COM
Patient has appointed themselves unofficial assistant trainer for the entire gym floor. Has, in the last hour: corrected a stranger's squat depth, suggested a different grip to a woman doing lat pulldowns, and advised a teenager to 'eat more.' Nobody asked. The teenager is 14. Patient believes they are being helpful.
Chronic. The coaching intensifies near novices.
None. A confrontation has been had and did not adjust the pattern.
Patients with Severe Gym Bro Unsolicited Coaching typically present with some or all of the following:
Patients diagnosed with Severe Gym Bro Unsolicited Coaching present with a cluster of recognizable behaviors we have, on reflection, decided to name. The condition is fictional. The behaviors, unfortunately, are not. Someone in your life is showing at least two of them right now.
The Institute's taxonomic entry lists it as Consilium non petitum muscularis, a binomial coined in-house and used nowhere in the peer-reviewed literature.
Think you have it? Find out what else you might be suffering from at the diagnosis generator. Or browse the full index of afflictions.