UNTREATABLE.COM
Patient watched a film their friends cried at and felt nothing. Ate their favorite meal and felt nothing. Received good news and felt, at best, a flicker. They are not sad. They are not happy. They are a beige wall, lightly warm.
Chronic. Symptoms exceed this clinic's diagnostic scope.
Untreatable at this level. A physician with actual credentials would, unfortunately, be more useful than our paperwork.
Patients with Severe Emotional Grayscale Syndrome typically present with some or all of the following:
Patients diagnosed with Severe Emotional Grayscale Syndrome present with a cluster of recognizable behaviors we have, on reflection, decided to name. The condition is fictional. The behaviors, unfortunately, are not. Someone in your life is showing at least two of them right now.
The Institute's taxonomic entry lists it as Affectus decoloratus totalis, a binomial coined in-house and used nowhere in the peer-reviewed literature.
Think you have it? Find out what else you might be suffering from at the diagnosis generator. Or browse the full index of afflictions.