UNTREATABLE.COM
Patient's water is no longer water. Contains: a Liquid IV packet, two drops of LMNT, a sugar-free flavor additive, a squeeze of lemon, and what patient insists is 'just a touch' of Crystal Light. Takes 14 minutes to prepare. Is, at this point, functionally a beverage. Patient calls it 'staying hydrated.' The actual water has, somehow, been edged out of the water.
Chronic. Plain water now reads as, to patient, under-seasoned.
None. The Stanley cup is full of what is, at best, a soft drink.
Patients with Chronic WaterTok Elaboration Disorder typically present with some or all of the following:
Chronic WaterTok Elaboration Disorder is a chronic behavioral condition cataloged by the Institute. It is not recognized by the DSM-5, the ICD-11, or any existing diagnostic framework — and will not be, because it is not a real condition. It is, however, observed in the population with alarming frequency.
In the Institute's formal nomenclature, this condition is catalogued under the Latin binomial Aqua supplementata excessive — a name not recognized by any medical authority but observed repeatedly in the catalog.
Think you have it? Find out what else you might be suffering from at the diagnosis generator. Or browse the full index of afflictions.