UNTREATABLE.COM
Patient has a Halloween countdown app active in April. Owns 31 candles labeled 'Cozy.' Has cried at a leaf.
Chronic. Symptoms lie dormant May–August.
Incurable. One PSL reactivates the entire arc.
Patients with Advanced Pumpkin-Spice Personality typically present with some or all of the following:
Advanced Pumpkin-Spice Personality belongs to the Institute's growing taxonomy of behaviors that real medicine has declined to name. It exists, roughly, at the intersection of internet culture, interpersonal friction, and whatever is happening in the lives of our patients. It is fictional and it is everywhere.
Under its Latin label Autumnus identitatis totalis, the condition appears only in the Institute's own catalog. Real clinicians do not recognize the term. They recognize the behavior.
Think you have it? Find out what else you might be suffering from at the diagnosis generator. Or browse the full index of afflictions.