UNTREATABLE.COM
Patient received a promotion and has spent the first three weeks pretending to understand what their new role entails. Googles acronyms in meetings. Nods confidently. Says 'totally, totally' to a question they did not hear. Has plans to learn what a 'P&L' is on the weekend.
Chronic. Eventually resolves into full fraud or actual competence. Odds are roughly even.
Untreatable. Asking for help feels like confessing.
Patients with Severe Promoted-Beyond-Panic Syndrome typically present with some or all of the following:
Patients diagnosed with Severe Promoted-Beyond-Panic Syndrome present with a cluster of recognizable behaviors we have, on reflection, decided to name. The condition is fictional. The behaviors, unfortunately, are not. Someone in your life is showing at least two of them right now.
The Institute's taxonomic entry lists it as Elevatio professionalis horror, a binomial coined in-house and used nowhere in the peer-reviewed literature.
Think you have it? Find out what else you might be suffering from at the diagnosis generator. Or browse the full index of afflictions.